Church was great today and love when we have 5th Sunday lessons. Bishop does a great job when he teaches them.
I get home from church and pick up the newspaper. What does it say up on the top of the front page? I'll just tell you so you don't have to guess. David Archuleta has a memoir coming out June 1st (this Tuesday). As I write this I am trying so hard not to laugh so that these words come out clear. Ok seriously what a joke. The newspaper, Salt Lake Tribune, gives the tag line to the article, and yes this is a direct quote, "...a memoir that serves as a motivational self-help book for fans." I will allow you to collect yourself as you probably are rolling on the floor at this very moment in hysteria. (Long pause.............)
David is only 19, and has only been singing pro since 2008 after her won American Idol. Really what does he have in terms of life experience to offer me, a 26 year old, or those that are older than me? I could probably learn more about the book called, All ABout Scabs, by Genichiro Yagyu. (I learned a ton from the book, The Gas We Pass, which I highly recommend.)
So David knows how it is to be on American Idol as a teen Mormon, and he knows how it is to play concerts in Utah to thousands of screaming 10 year old girls, but what about me? Oh wait he could teach me about proper use of... no he could teach me how to... man this is hard, he has nothing that I can think of. I mean I don't recall the last time 10-12 year old girls came chasing after me. Unless this kid has tricks and trades of being in the Activity/FHE Committee chair, gathering donations for humanitarian relief, or best ways to break into war photography... I doubt I'll read it. I also have a hard time of receiving self-help from people that have have personal shoppers and can be found on the top of birthday cakes. (Yeah I think it would be awkward to be eating his left eye. Only a Dr has permission to see the inside of me, not David).
As you can tell I am making a joke of this whole thing. Good for David, but seriously, maybe you should live grown-up life some more and reach mid 20's. After then maybe we can relate (laughing now). I don't like his music so now I am lying to my readers by saying I would read it if he was older. I must not lie, I never could read a book based on him.
I must leave for now. I have to meet with a publisher about my memoir as Director of the C.I.A.
-Gawdun
4 comments:
I appauld all the above comments.
He can teach you how to say true. HA! Little did you know that the proper pronunciation is not "true" at all, but "Ta-RUE"... look it up. The all knowing Archuleta has spoken. ;)
Actually, he could probably teach you how to make money out of nothing. Like writing a memoir at 19.
That's cool - you were the director of the CIA? Awesome.
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